Dreams of Darkness, Dreams of Light A Tokyo Babylon/X/1999 story Aishuu On Sumeragi Subaru’s sixteenth birthday, his grandmother pulled him aside right before he went to bed. It had been a very long day, and knew that tomorrow would be even longer for he and his sister would finally be moving to Tokyo and enrolling in the CLAMP school, as they had been planning to for years. All he wanted to do was curl up on his futon, but something about the way his grandmother was looking at him warned him that she was about to tell him something profound. He forced his tired mind to pay attention as she spoke to him. “Subaru...” she started, and there was something in her eyes that forced the last of his fatigue from his mind. “Yes, grandmother?” he said when she didn’t continued. “I’ve had a message from a... friend. She told me that she’s going to give you a special gift, to celebrate your assumption of your complete duties as head of the clan.” The older woman clenched her fist. “That’s nice of her,” Subaru said, smiling brightly. Then he grew more serious, noticing his grandmother’s concern. “Is this from a family friend, or from a... work friend?” he asked hesitantly. ‘Work friends’ tended to have weird and sometimes dangerous ideas of what constituted gifts. After the incident with the inugami, he had learned to be cautious about ‘work friends.’ His grandmother relaxed slightly. “She’s a work friend. I don’t think she means any harm, but she wants to send you a dream tonight. She’s a yumemi, and the dream she sends will be full of symbolism and the future.” “A yumemi...” Subaru’s eyes widened. It was a rare and powerful gift, and having someone offer to share a foretelling dream with him was truly a meaningful thing. “That’s very kind of her!” Subaru said. “Is it? There’s reasons yumemi aren’t happy people,” his grandmother said. “You probably won’t remember much, if anything. The images will be ingrained on your subconscious, influencing how you act in the future without your awareness. It’s dangerous for a man to know too much of his own future.” Subaru gave her the sweet smile that everyone around him knew and cherished. “If she’s a yumemi, I’m sure she wouldn’t do anything to hurt me. Not if she’s a friend,” he told his grandmother. The former clan head nodded slowly. “You’d better head to bed. It’s best not to keep her waiting. I’m sure she’s weaving the dream to send right now.” Subaru’s eyes widened in panic. “She’s waiting? Oh, that’s so rude... I hate being late...” He dashed to his room, sliding the door shut behind him, obviously horrified at his perceived lapse in manners. His grandmother watched him go, a smile pulling at her lips. “Subaru, you’ll never change,” she murmured to herself, unaware of how very wrong her words were. *** Subaru had expected sleep to be hard to find, but to his surprise, his fatigue outweighed his nervousness over entering a prophetic dream. He suspected that his grandmother’s friend might have added an extra nudge, for as soon as he head hit the pillow, he found himself sliding under into the world of sleep... and into a place he didn’t recognize. He was lying in a place that he could only think of as nowhere. Around him, there was simply nothing, just a thick purple haze. “This is a bit dizzying,” he murmured, rising to his feet slowly. “I knew the Dreamscape could be empty, but...” he whispered. He glanced down at himself, raising an eyebrow as he saw how he was dressed. “White...” he reflected. Everything in the dream was probably symbolic, so he forced himself to take note. His gloves were on his hands as usual, and apparently the yumemi had taken a page out of Hokuto’s book; or his subconscious had. He hated to think which it was. The entirely white outfit was made of the finest materials he had ever worn, which was something, considering Hokuto’s eternal quest for the perfect style for her beloved brother. A loose shirt was tucked into white leather pants, which wouldn’t have been that bad, but the shirt was entirely sheer. He raised a hand to his head and removed a white beret, relieved that it, at least, was normal. “I’m so glad Hokuto’s not here to see this....” He glanced down again, noting that his feet were bare. The Dreamscape seemed to stir at his words, and his eyes narrowed. Subaru looked around, waiting for whatever the yumemi had arranged. “I hope this is over soon...” he whispered. “I don’t think I want to know to much.” The scent of sakura petals came to him, making him feel dizzy and off-balance. He tilted his head slightly, turning to see Hokuto standing in the distance, dressed in his shikifuku. “Neesan!” he called to her, but she was unaware of his presence, walking towards something he couldn’t see. The sakura’s fragrance grew more intense, and then there was a loud sound from his other side, the sound of a falcon, distracting him momentarily. He glanced where the noise had come from, but there was nothing there, only the feel of intense emptiness. When he shifted his eyes over to where Hokuto had been, there was nothing. “Neesan...” he whispered, taking a few steps toward where she had been, only to pushed back by something he wasn’t able to break. “What does it mean?” He asked, falling to his knees. Was Hokuto going to leave him? Were they going to grow apart as they grew older? Everything in a dream means something, he told himself. It was one of the most basic rules of the Dreamscape. He bit his lip, knowing that the symbolism of dreams often didn’t make sense until the event it represented had passed. “It means the beginning of the end is coming,” a voice said from behind him. Subaru whirled around, and he gasped as he looked upon a black-winged angel. Black hair framed a pale face set in a handsome face, and he stared in astonishment in the jewel-like amethyst eyes. If not for the wings, he would have assumed the stranger was just another boy his age... but his wings.... Huge ebony wings trailed to the ground, and in his hand he held a sword wrapped in red ribbons, a sword which Subaru thought he heard crying. The feathers so black that they shone with blue, green and deep purple light, and Subaru wished he could touch them... ...but this was a Dream. He must had have spoken aloud, for the boy answered. “No, she brought me here to meet you,” the boy replied softly. His eyes wandered over Subaru with a kind of wonder that made the onmyouji feel off-balance. He let the sword go and Subaru had to shield his eyes from the sudden storm of black feathers and the boy’s wings vanished, leaving only an apparently average teenager, although beautiful, teenager behind. He was dressed in mourning black, and Subaru’s instinct told him that the boy had known a lot of sorrow throughout his life. “Who are you?” he asked the boy who until moments before had bore the wings of a black angel. The boy smiled at him sadly. “I can’t tell you. No names can be spoken here; it will shatter the Dreamscape. We don’t have a yumemi present, so there’s no one to hold the integrity of the Dreamscape should we reveal something powerful, like a true name.” Subaru blushed. “I should have known that.” “You were the one who taught me it. I wonder if I just created a paradox, telling you,” the boy mused. Subaru’s head spun, unable to grasp the temporal mechanics. “Probably not. You’re from my future, and I’m from your past....”he whispered, trying to understand what was happening. This hadn’t been what he had been expecting at all; this boy seemed too real to be a symbolistic dream message. The boy nodded, leaning in closer. “I never imagined that you looked so much like I did, when you were my age.” He stepped closer, kneeling down next to Subaru to stare at him in fascination. Subaru felt his trademark blush rise on his cheeks. It was strange, speaking with someone who knew him in the future. “How old am I, when we meet?” Subaru asked curiously. “How do we meet? If you’re here, in this dream, that means you have to be very important to me...” The boy hesitated. “Twenty-five. As for the rest, I...” he trailed off, his eyes once again shifting away. “That’s 1999, then,” Subaru calculated, saving the boy from having to answer. The boy seemed to be full of secrets, but Subaru’s extensive empathy refused to press him and bring him sorrow. The boy shuddered. “1999 isn’t a year that should be spoken lightly, especially by a Seal.” “Seal?” Lavender eyes widened in surprise. “You... don’t know?” “It’s something about my future? I do something magically?” Subaru asked reasonably. He was the clan head of the Sumeragi, and sealing things was something within the spectrum of his powers. The boy shifted. “I... it’s about 1999. No one ever told you? I thought...” “You thought what?” Subaru asked curiously, feeling a sense of foreboding well up in him. From the way boy was talking, there was something bigger than casting a spell. The boy leaned over. “I thought you grew up knowing about your destiny.” “Destiny?” Subaru echoed. “Your destiny as a Dragon of Heaven, one of the protectors of humanity,” the boy whispered softly. “No one told you?” “How would anyone know a thing like that?” Subaru echoed, trying to regain his equilibrium. Apparently this was why the yumemi had selected this boy to meet him. “Your grandmother knows. She knew since you were born. You were born under the right star,” the boy said fiercely. “She’s been training you your whole life for it!” the boy said fiercely, suddenly passionately angry. Subaru rested a hand on the boy’s arm, trying to calm him down. “I... I’m the head of the Sumeragi clan. That’s why I’ve been trained. Perhaps it’s an extension of those duties.” The boy stared at him in disbelief. “You’re too kind,” he said in shock. “I...” “Am I that different, in the future?” Subaru asked. How would he be, in ten years? He wondered. The boy shifted his eyes. “You accept things just as easily.” Subaru wasn’t sure that was a compliment. “Sometimes the only thing we can do is accept what fate deals us,” he said softly, staring down at the gloves which bore the markings of the Sakurazukamori. He had that as a fate; now learning he would also be a protector of earth didn’t seem such a terrible thing. At least he would be helping people. He looked up at the boy, seeing the boy’s sorrow. “Is it such a bad thing, to be a Seal?” The boy looked back at him, his eyes still angry. “It brings people nothing but sorrow, but they can only raise the Kekkai by thinking of those they love. It’s not fair that they have to sacrifice so much and are given nothing in return!” he said. Subaru gave him a gentle smile, before reaching out to take the boy’s hand. “I’m sure it’s worth it. If I can protect the ones I love, I will bear any sacrifice,” he told him. The boy’s eyes flickered, and before he knew what was happening, Subaru found himself being thoroughly kissed. Subaru had never been kissed, and he didn’t react for a few moments, feeling shocked at the suddenness of it. The boy’s mouth was hot on his, demanding a response. Subaru raised a hand to the boy’s cheek and shyly kissed him back, trying to follow his pace. The kisses were dizzying and intense, and Subaru felt like he had just cast a spell that allowed him to commune with the boy’s soul... The boy broke the kiss after a moment, smiling slightly. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. “It’s so weird, seeing you my age.” “I...” Subaru started, but was unable to think of anything to say. He had never been particularly good with words. The boy grinned wickedly, and Subaru reflected that the expression suited him better than the sorrow he had worn earlier did. “Your clothing is also much more...” he trailed off. “It’s not my fault!” Subaru protested, feeling a blush creep up his cheeks again. “I like it,” the boy whispered back, he raised his hands to Subaru’s shirt and began to toy with the buttons. He leaned over again, looking Subaru in the eye. “Kiss me?” he asked. Subaru smiled a bit before grasping the boy’s face in both of his hands and obliging. The boy’s lips were soft and strangely seemed to be the only real thing in the plane of illusions and warped interpretations. The boy darted his tongue out to lick Subaru’s mouth, and Subaru paused for a second, not sure how to replied. “It’s okay,” the boy told him gently. “I won’t hurt you,” he promised. Subaru blinked a bit in surprise. “I never thought you would.” The thought had never crossed his mind; despite the boy’s black wings and quick temper, Subaru’s instincts told him that this boy cared deeply for him. “You trust me?” the boy asked in surprise. He drew back, though his hands lingered on the shirt, which Subaru realized he had gotten open somehow. Subaru looked down, though his shyness was strangely missing. This was a dream, and chances were the boy wouldn’t remember it, if he was really there. That made him feel uncharacteristically bold. He pressed his hands on the boy’s shirt, finding it hooked with simple black buttons that easily slid apart at his touch. The boy watched him in wonder as Subaru leaned forward, pressing a few kisses against the white chest he was unveiling. “Have you given me any reason not to trust you?” he replied. The boy shook his head wordlessly before shrugging out of the shirt, then reaching forward with the speed of a striking serpent to push Subaru backwards, knocking the white beret off. Subaru gulped a bit as he fell onto his back. The boy straddled him dominantly, but the tenderness in his eyes as he stared at Subaru and the way his right hand cradled the onmyouji’s head convinced Subaru that his feelings weren’t about sex. Who are you? Subaru wondered to himself. The boy stared at him for a moment longer before moving forward, crouching over Subaru in so all Subaru could see was glowing lavender eyes. “Stop me,” he told him. “Why?” Subaru asked. “Because you don’t know me right now, and it’s not fair for lovers to be unequal,” the boy answered. The boy was trying to say something important to him, but Subaru couldn’t take time to reflect on it. His body was responding to the delicious nearness in a predictable teenage male fashion, tensing up and he felt his groin start to swell. For once, Subaru decided to pay attention to them; after all, this was a dream and it wouldn’t have any lasting repercussions. “Thank you for your concern,” Subaru whispered. “But this is a dream,” he continued, and his free hand drifted over to the boy’s pants, brushing gently against the laced-up crotch. “I think we can indulge in a fantasy.” The boy jerked in surprise, taking a deep breath. “S-“ he started, but the Dreamscape around them rippled as he came dangerously close to speaking Subaru’s real name. “Are you sure?” he asked. Subaru nodded, his hand starting to fumble with the laces of the pants. Hokuto would have loved the design, but all it did was frustrate the hell out of her brother. He was skilled at doing things with his gloves on, but sometimes delicate tasks were difficult. The boy saw the problem immediately, and he sat up completely, taking Subaru’s right hand in his own, apparently intent on removing it. “No!” Subaru said, making a fist to stop him. “I can’t take them off!” His heart plummeted. How well did the boy know him, if he didn’t know the simple fact that Sumeragi Subaru never removed his gloves, not even for his sister? “This is a dream,” the boy shot back, echoing his words from earlier. “And I know why you wear them.” Subaru felt tears come to his eyes, tears of relief. The boy knew why? Not even Hokuto was privy to that information... how close must they be in the future, for him to know about the marks? He relaxed his fist, allowing the boy to slide the white glove off. His hand felt strangely naked without the gloves, but the boy gave him a smile, bringing it to his mouth and kissing his palm gently. “You have such beautiful hands... musician’s hands.” Subaru nodded, raising his left hand to his mouth to use his teeth to get the other glove off. Now that he knew he could remove them safely, he wanted to touch his lover everywhere, feel someone else. It had been eight years without human touch, and eight years felt like an eternity.... The boy acted as though he understood, releasing his hand. He patiently waited while Subaru’s hands trailed over his chest, tracing the subtle play of muscles, shivering when they toyed with his nipples. Subaru’s hands were nearly white from lack of sunlight, and he marveled at seeing them actually doing something. He couldn’t remember the last time he had looked at them for more than the fifteen seconds it took to change gloves or the brief, five minute showers he was allowed. Subaru’s delighted smile pulled at lips, and final the boy’s restraint broke. His own hands moved forward, finding the button on Subaru’s pants and undoing it. Mischievous eyes watched Subaru’s apprehensive expression as the his hand crept into Subaru’s pants. Subaru gasped as cool fingers contacted his warm flesh. “Oh!” “Does it feel good?” the boy asked. Subaru nodded, his hands finding purchase on the boy’s shoulders. The boy leaned forward to catch Subaru’s lips in another kiss, this time parting his lips and plunging his tongue into Subaru’s mouth immediately. Subaru opened his mouth in shock, and the boy took full advantage, running his tongue over the roof of Subaru’s mouth and touching the tip of his tongue to Subaru’s before breaking it. Subaru gasped for breath, his green eyes wide in dazed pleasure as the boy turned his attention to Subaru’s pants, sliding the zip down slowly. His hand lingered for a moment, and Subaru felt his sex swell. The boy’s hands traveled to the waistband, taking a hold of it to slide the rest of Subaru’s clothing down in one smooth movement. Subaru felt the chill of his nakedness, and his hand automatically sought to cover himself, but the boy grabbed them. “I’m still dressed,” he pointed out. He place Subaru’s hands on his pants and waited. The onmyouji nodded, and his fingers sought the ties that had defeated him before. They were still tough to undo, but they eventually gave, and the boy sighed with relief when Subaru pushed his clothing aside. “Better?” Subaru asked. “Much,” the boy replied. He reared up on his knees, totally unconcerned with his state of undress. Subaru studied him, fascinated at how similar their builds were. They were both slender and subtly muscled, and Subaru would wager that the other boy had been called bishounen more than once. Still, the other boy seemed to be.... Subaru couldn’t think of the word he wanted before the boy started to run hands all over Subaru’s body, exploring it again. Subaru felt the heat concentrate in his penis, which was the only part the boy wasn’t touching. He bucked, trying to attention to the place where unbearable pressure was starting to build. The boy laughed before moving down Subaru’s body. He studied Subaru once before planting a kiss on each of Subaru’s hipbones and then taking the head of the onmyouji’s sex into his mouth. Subaru yelped in surprise, but the boy ignored it, merely toying with the tip of his penis. The boy’s moist tongue ran over the tiny hole, and Subaru turned his head from side to side, raising his hips again, trying to get the boy to take him in deeper. The boy placed a restraining hand on Subaru’s lower stomach, forcing him to remain relatively still. “Please,” Subaru begged, his hands creeping into the boy’s silky hair, trying to press him down. The boy let him go, sliding back without offering satisfaction. Subaru stared in surprise as the boy crawled on his hands and knees so he knelt above him directly, meeting his eyes squarely. “I needed to make sure you were ready,” he told Subaru. “I’m ready!” Subaru told him. A smile flickered on the boy’s face, and Subaru felt himself being rolled over onto his stomach suddenly. His erection brushed against ground painfully but the boy was kneeling behind him, and there was a finger probing at his anus. It was slick with some kind of coating.... how had the other boy.... “It’s a dream,” the boy whispered to him, making Subaru tilt his hips up to better accommodate their lovemaking. “Just accept it.” Subaru nodded slowly, pushing against the finger. One finger became two, and then three... the slender fingers tried to spread him, a process which made him sore and brought a strange sort of pleasure, and Subaru knew enough about homosexual sex to realize what would be coming.... The fingers fell away a little later, and then he felt something larger replace them. It tested the rim gently, and he instinctively tensed, before forcing himself to relax. This was just a dream.... he reminded himself. When he woke up, there would be no pain.... The feeling of the first thrust felt all too real and too painful. He squirmed forward, trying to escape, the invasion, but the boy’s hands grabbed his shoulders, and kisses were showered on his scalp. “Shhh....” the boy soothed. “It will get better,” he promised. “I know.” Subaru nodded, but tears of pain were creeping down his face. “Continue,” he whispered. His body was still aroused, and he needed... he needed.... The boy seemed to understand. His hand wrapped around Subaru’s body, wrapping around his erection gently. He caressed it lovingly, and Subaru moaned. The boy was still inside him, but the feel of burning pain was lessening, and with the cool fingers addressing his erection, he felt the build-up towards climax approaching. The boy squeezed him a little bit more forcefully, and Subaru instinctively moved, sliding back. The effect created a renewed thrust, and the boy shifted inside of him, and Subaru gritted his teeth, ready to scream when the boy’s penis hit his prostate. He pushed back harder, wanting to feel that sensation again. The boy didn’t need any encouragement, setting an uneven rate of thrusts as he tried to remember to pay attention to Subaru’s erection while moving in the onmyouji’s body. It was strangely thrilling for Subaru, how the other boy seemed to be losing his concentration, and the frantic pounding sent Subaru over the edge. He exploded, ejaculating on the boy’s hand and going rigid before slumping forwards. The contractions of his muscles gripped the boy’s penis, and the boy climaxed as well. Subaru felt a hot spurt of moistness from the boy, and then the boy slumped on top of him, lying there. Their heavy breathing was the only thing in existence, the rhythm the only thing Subaru’s fuzzy mind could focus on. The boy regained his energy before Subaru, rolling off of him and arranging them so they faced each other with their arms around each other. “We really shouldn’t have done this....” the boy said in a distant voice. “Still, I can’t bring myself to regret it.” He stared into Subaru’s green eyes. “I’ve learned that happiness is fleeting, and life doesn’t give us room for second chances.” Subaru smiled at his lover. “I wish I could stay here, in this moment forever...” “Don’t make wishes lightly,” the boy replied. “We only get one,” he said grimly. Subaru’s eyes widened in hurt at the rebuke, and the boy seemed to immediately regret his hasty words. He reached out a hand and cradled Subaru’s cheek. “I’m sorry, Subaru-san. But...” He leaned over and kissed him, apparently deciding it was better not to speak. The onmyouji felt his hurt melt away. “We’ll meet someday,” he promised. “And...” he began, wanting to promise the other one that they would love each other... but a throb of pain ripped through him, causing him to jerk away, clutching his hands. The boy watched with angry, helpless eyes. “Go away!” he yelled angrily at the nothingness that surrounded them. Subaru convulsed, the marks on his hands that had plagued him his entire life flaring into prominence, bringing tears of pain to his eyes. He looked at the other boy, wishing there was something he could do to stop this, to bring back the contentment he had been feeling.... The boy, though, apparently knew more then Subaru. “Take this!” the boy said, pressing something into Subaru’s hand. “Please... he’s not the only one who’ll love you...” He heard a voice then, a dark hypnotic one which ripped through the Dreamscape. “He’s not yours... he’s my prey, my Subaru-kun!” Around them, the Dreamscape shattered. ***** Hinoto was waiting for his sister. She knelt in her place, her blind eyes able only to see in this realm. “Hello, Kanoe.” “So the puppet master begins the dance,” Kanoe mused, tapping her clawlike nails against her chin. “I don’t quite see why you did that, but it was certainly interesting to watch.” She ran her hand over her breasts, licking her lips. “They are beautiful... but where did you get Kamui from?” “Time is meaningless on the Dreamscape. I merely pulled Kamui’s sixteen year old self here... since he is the Kamui, it’s easily done.” Hinoto seemed sorrowful as she considered something else. “The boy leaves for Tokyo tomorrow.” “To begin his road?” Kanoe asked. She slitted her eyes, trying to remember what she had glimpse while peeking in on some of Hinoto’s other visions. “He’s already begun it... when he met that person under the sakura tree.” “The first of our dragons to dance,” Kanoe realized. “And... this game now?” “You know what’s coming.” “I do,” Kanoe said. “It will be exciting to watch the prelude of the Final Days.” Hinoto lowered her head slightly, averting her face from her sister. Kanoe knew how to read her moods too well for her liking. “He needed to have a connection to Kamui. When Kamui needs him, he will answer the call.” Kanoe’s smile grew even wider. “But that’s assuming Kamui makes that choice. He could always choose to become a Dragon of Earth. Kamui is the only one who has a choice; all you showed Subaru is a possible Kamui...” A shadow passed over Hinoto’s normally sorrowful features, one which Kanoe didn’t recognize. “I’ll make sure he makes the right choice,” she said. “Their destiny is foreordained.” ***** “Subaru!” Hokuto said, piercing through the place that was neither sleeping or awareness. Subaru stretched slowly, returning to consciousness slowly with the reluctant lethargy of someone awakening from a dream they didn’t want to forget. He tried to grab at those memories, tried to commit them to memory, but in the morning light, they faded like the dew. “Su-ba-ru!” His sister’s voice came again, emphasizing his name in the curious manner only she could. “We need to get going! Our train leaves in two hours, and I have the cutest outfit for you!” He blinked slowly, brushing raising a hand to brush the last dregs of sleep from his eyes. Subaru jumped a bit when he realized that his hand was holding something already... A black feather. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ END [ back ]
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